Hearts on Our Sleeve

For once in my life I'm finally in agreement with everyone that has told me who I am as a person isn't meant for this world. Trying for years to hold out hope that there was some kind of meaning to this. Instead I think those with a big heart are just a cruel joke created like the platypus. No matter how hard we try to get someone to understand us, our way of feeling, of thinking. It gets put down, we're told we're trying to hard or we're made to feel like we're simple minded, the cruelty of this world now days doesn't understand what it's like to be ruled by your heart and emotions. A passionate person feels more deeply than someone who isn't. They pour all of themselves into everything. Hoping it's enough for recognition, praise, or being seen for their light.
This world starts to become to much. There's no compassion, no empathy. Loyalty and honor don't mean shit in a cold world like this? So what do you do when that means nothing to people nowadays? Especially when that's mostly what makes you, you? When it's to a point where you've lost everything else and that's all you have left to give? You start to feel lost. Thinking you'd give anything to change who you are to be cold and cruel like everyone else. (Even though you were always told don't change those things about yourself because it was rare)  It makes you start to question "Why me?" Why not someone else?  Can we trade places? Despite all of the horrible shit, horrible things that's been done to me. That I've been through. Why can't I build a wall around my heart? Why can't I make feeling everything stop? We're the last of a dying breed. Almost extinct and honestly it's for the best. Suffering like this is only existing. Going through the motions of each day trying so hard to act cold, be cold, hoping maybe today's the day everything breaks.  Your head or your heart? Maybe both. Just to get a little relief in a world where we shouldn't be.